Not my typical kind of post.......(you have been warned!!)

I have all kinds of thoughts flying around in my head today. I have been reflecting on a certain area of my life and all the baggage I seem to be carrying around with it. I just felt compelled to share some thoughts on here. 

This has to do with sex! Yup, you heard me!! But the heart of the matter really comes from Christ and knowing the truth about who we are in Him. So in that sense, I guess this is a normal post for me. What I was thinking about, was all the bad 'christian' advice I have been given over the years on this subject. I don't even know if those who gave it meant well, I think they thought they meant well, but all they did was turn sex into a law within marriage. I have to say this is extremely damaging, in many ways. Anyway, one of the things that was called to my mind was the counsel a pastor gave me concerning my future marriage. Okay here's where it gets kind of personal, and I apologize in advance for the sheer openness of this part. My husband and I came into marriage having had sex prior to marriage. We also struggled to stay 'pure' before we were married. (I know a lot of you are saying who doesn't have that struggle, right!) Well, let's just say that where I went to church if you struggled and confessed, you were setting yourself up for some serious condemnation!! So, my pastor essentially told me something like this, " since you did not remain pure, you will bring struggle to this area of your marriage." Those were not the exact words, but the heart of his counsel. And what did that wonderful counsel do for me? It made me feel very condemned in this area, it made me begin to resent my husband for not 'leading' me well while dating. It made me think we were both so selfish and it made me view sex in a skewed way. In other words a lot of turmoil for nothing. 

The way I see it, is God is not counting my sins against me. He is not angry with me, nor does He have any punishment for my sins. He also turns all things into good for those who love Him. And He restores the years and makes all things new! So, are my odds at having a good sex life in my marriage reduced because I made poor choices! NO, NO and NO!! What He should have told me was the wonderful truth of who I am in God's eyes and how wonderful the Gospel really is!! That is the only power to turn broken areas of our lives into beautifully restored areas! 

I am honestly angry that there is so much crappy advice out there and so much of it brings condemnation which only defeats people further! I had to bring this up for another reason too, because I think there is teaching out there that is really harmful for married couples. It's the teaching that comes straight from the Bible, but gets turned into a law. The scripture about "do not deprive one another." Now that is simply put, plain old good advice, I won't deny it. However, it's not good advice to just dish out when there are other areas in a marriage that are problematic and need to first be resolved. I think sex is a fruit of a good marriage, not a right or demand within marriage. Nor is it a quick fix to marital problems.  I think at times people need to reknew their minds and get rid of lots of negativity surrounding this area. The enemy will stop at nothing to keep God's people from enjoying this most precious gift. He wants to skew it so far from the beautiful picture that it is and from the power it has to bring together a couple in a profound way. 

I would like to ask Christian counselors and pastors across the world to consider what I am about to share in regards to truly helping couples with sexual struggles, of any form.  Trust the Christ in others!!! 

While I was at the conference in Hong Kong, Josh Mills shared a story about a friend sharing with  him a vision God gave him and something he felt they should do. So Josh said "Okay, let's do it." He proceeded to say, "Isn't it good for us to trust our brothers and sisters in Christ and trust the Christ in them."  I also think Fini brought it up at one point as well as Rob, and not to mention it's something my dear friend Jamie repeatedly shares. We can trust this Divine Life we have been given, (that's quoting my friend Chris Welch). When is the church going to stop distrusting themselves and each other and instead start trusting the Holy Spirit!! I must say when we see our brothers and sisters in this light we have hope for the breakthrough, do we not. Because the Holy Spirit will lead us into all truth, will he not!! 

So, I bring this up because it's something I am processing, and an area that I am seeing God is planning to bring full restoration in my life. He wants to see us reign in Life! Whether it takes days, weeks, months or years, there is always hope for every area of our life to improve in Christ. To bloom, and flourish! 

For those of you who may be reading this and are single, well I know this post can benefit you too. I wish I had a better understanding of many things prior to being married, however some things you can only learn by experience. But nonetheless, this can be a beautiful thing in your future to look forward to. If you have already lost your virginity or have made mistakes or have wrong views on sex, you can live in freedom in Christ in this area. Don't feel guilty or condemned for your mistakes.  A friend of mine told me, when she'd find her husband struggling with pornography, she would tell him, "don't be condemned." That is a gift! Jesus never condemned broken sinnners, he always gave them the gift of no condemnation. So I say to anyone who has some area of brokenness sexually, Do not for one second feel one bit of shame or guilt. You are perfect in Him! You are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus! He is doing a new thing in you even today!!

I won't even try to give advice to fix anyone's problems, because the Holy Spirit is a way better counselor. All I can say is you can be free in any area of struggle in life. I don't know what that will look like practically walked out, but I do know this, when you let the Holy Spirit work in your heart, he will bring about the good fruit that you will soon bear!! I promise!! 

Grace and peace to all who read here today!!

Hong Kong Details (Part 1)

I honestly don't know where to begin as I attempt to share about my trip to Hong Kong.  I can clearly say God had a plan for me, and he most certainly paved the way to get me there. But as I reflect, I am slightly surprised at the outcome of my going. Often we can go away on these kinds of things, to conferences and come back on a 'spiritual high' so to speak. I am finding the result of my trip to be quite different from that common preconceived notion. 

Before I get into anything heavy, I must share how blessed I was to get SO much fellowship for the week. I stayed with Julie and that was awesome. Let me tell you this girl has a fierce hunger for truth and is a bold lover of grace. We were able to talk and talk and talk, with no little ones interrupting. And we have never spent that kind of time together before, it really was a great privilege. Julie you really do inspire and bless me, more than you know! Not to mention the last 2 days when Ursula joined us. I met Ursula through our online blogging community and actually got to meet her in the flesh. And she is from a whole different nation than me, how cool is that!! Ursula is a very fun loving, lover of truth as well, and she is definitely worth getting to know. Ursula, I SO enjoyed meeting you and I feel so truly knitted to you like a sister. What a privilege we had to be together in Hong Kong!! I hope to spend time with you again in the future!! 

I also had the privilege of meeting various other folks from around the world. All folks that are so eager to see the pure Gospel of grace and good news spread abroad through the nations. There were over 20 nations or so represented at the conference. After Rob read the list and had each nation's representatives stand on the first night, he said, "How did you people hear about this?" 

On Thursday, Julie and I had lunch with some of the folks that were attending the conference that were a part of Grace Revolution, a growing network to talk all about Grace. Ryan Rufus, Rob's son, also joined us for lunch. I didn't get too much of a chance to talk with anyone very in depth, but we all chatted and laughed together over a meal. That was so surreal. Eating with several nations in our midst. Both Julie and I, really enjoyed talking to Wayne, aka 'Wayno', he felt like a brother to us. He made us laugh a lot, and we enjoyed his heart and passion for truth as well. 

If I were to be honest, I think this was my favorite part about the conference, simply the fellowship. Many of us who have come out of legalism into pure grace have found it to be a very lonely place. It seems that most churches across the globe are not preaching the purity of the Gospel these days. Therefore, those who come into grace find themselves leaving the church. It's a lonely season, where not many Christians fully get us or what we believe. Funny, cause we just believe God at His word and embrace the truly good goodness of the 'Good News' of the Gospel!! But really, I think honestly I can do without the conferences. Not that I didn't enjoy the conference, I did very much. It can just be so full and so busy, when what I really crave is to talk to others about their experiences in grace. I love testimonies! 

However, that said, I really honestly loved getting to witness Rob Rufus minister in real life. It felt so comfortable and so natural to sit under his teaching. It was also quite fun to get to watch him preach. He is quite the animated passionate speaker, and it's fun to see him live!! If anyone is interested you can watch live Grace Stream TV, linked on Julie's blog and find Rob on there to watch! 

Another aspect of the conference that I enjoyed was corporate worship in the presence of God. I think the whole place was on fire. Lots of happy Jesus lovers all ignited in praise and worship, you just never know what will happen!! I particularly enjoyed the time that Anneline led worship. Anneline is a member of CCI, originally from South Africa and I just loved her immensely!! I enjoyed meeting members of the worship team, so now I know whose voice I am listening to on the Ipod. 

There were many times of further ministry during worship, as well as extended worship. It was awesome! On Friday night, they had something called a fire tunnel. Dan was very much hoping there would be!! He had a wonderful encounter with God 2 years ago and hoped for the same for us. Basically, it's just a good way to lay hands on people and pray and impart. So, the WHOLE conference went through a fire tunnel of 8 or so people laying hands on every single person in the building. It was wild!! They warned us that if you end up clogging up the tunnel, you will be carried or dragged out, so it can keep flowing. I wish I could have just watched as each person went through, even though I didn't get to, I do believe it was video recorded!! (hmmm, wonder if I will ever get to see it!) This is one of those things that may not make a whole lot of cerebral sense to many, and I honestly can't say for sure what God did in me because of it. However, I was open to receive whatever He had for me, and alas I did end up getting dragged out. God most definitely touched me with heaven's voltage. Many were touched and many weren't. But mostly I think what was important was to have fun and know that God works in many ways, He speaks in many ways and He knows how we each individually need to hear from Him. 

Many times, mostly all of the meetings, I  sensed His presence and just smiled and delighted in the awesomeness of it all!! He is at times so tangible and so real, it's just so wonderful!! I definitely have never experienced His Presence like this in my old church. 

There certainly is so much more I could write about, but for now I am tired and have more processing to do. I simply wanted to share at least a tidbit of my time in Hong Kong for now.I guess I am kind of leaving you all hanging a bit. Hope to update some more when the fog goes away...........Grace and peace to all! 

Fresh tunes.......

Just wanted to take a minute to put in a plug for some new worship music I got my hands on in Hong Kong. Michelle Bass, a lovely worshipper out of South Africa, put together an album. I highly recommend checking her out! Here is her MySpace page...............Hope you enjoy her songs as much as I am!!

And when I get back in the groove and my mind lets me, I will post more details on my trip to Hong Kong..............

Grace and Peace!!

Last day.......

Julie, Ursula and Me!

This was the elevator we took each day to our room, it was always crowded!!

This was the wonderful little Indian restaurant we ate at, right in

the building we stayed in.

This is the Building we stayed in, Chungking Mansions. (see Ursula

in the front!!)

Waiting to cross the street.......

They cook the whole duck and goose, not a familiar sight in the US.

I thought this tree was so pretty it had lovely pink blossoms.

There weren't a whole lot of trees and flowers to observe. 

Glenda Rufus, not the clearest picture, but I wanted

to put it up anyway.........

Girls just wanna have fun.........

Last night we went out for dinner and ended up seeing a huge 

Guinness sign that was calling our names. We knew it had to be an

Irish pub and that sounded good to us. So we had a lovely meal

together there. We had much great conversation together.

I think we are all enjoying the fellowship immensely. 

And of course when we got back to the hall, much more chatting 

ensued and of course much laughing as well. 

Today is the last day we will all be here, and we are all looking

forward to attending City Church International. 

Ursula joins us!!

We found an Indian restaurant in our building Friday night, and had to go back 

it was so good. So we took Ursula there for lunch today. 

Above- Me and Urs

Below - Julie and Urs

Our view - above

We got a new room when Urs came, and it was quite an upgrade 

from our last room

So as you can see Ursula joined us today, and we are having a 

blast with her. I passed out for a nap this afternoon from all

the antihistamines I am taking (thanks Dan!) and these two girls

chatted away! We just got back from dinner at an Irish pub. I just love all 

the variety of cultures we are experiencing here!! 

Tomorrow is our last day before the treck back home!!

More photos......

Below - Sandy and Louise. Ladies we met attending the conference

as well. They knew Rob from his church in South Africa 10 or more years ago. 

Above - Julie basking in the sun on the ferry

Below - Julie took a survey this young guy had and he 

wanted a picture of them!! Isn't he cute!!

One more conference session left to go, and then church on Sunday. Today we got to walk around a bit more and took a ferry around the harbor. That was particularly nice to get out of the crowded streets and breath some fresh air and smell the salt water and soak in the sunshine!! While on the ferry we met some folks that were also attending the conference. They all knew Rob from back when he was a pastor in South Africa. That was pretty cool!! I am just loving meeting people from so many nations. Ask of me and I will give you the nations, says the Lord. It is a beautiful thing to be united to the whole world in this way!!

Hong Kong photos......

Ryan Rufus and Wayne Duncan

Having lunch with folks from Grace Revolution

Rob preaching the first session

Downtown Hong Kong

Wayne and Julie preaching to each other

More downtown shots

Having ice cream with the revolutionaries

 This is Farrah Dearlove and  her 

daughter Rio, who came to the conference from Dubai. 

(Isn't she a cutie pie!!)

.............First day in Hong Kong!!

Well here I am in Hong Kong!! I can't even believe it still! I arrived at 8 pm Hong Kong time, which is 8am my time in Philadelphia! The flight was long, but seemed to go rather quickly. I was so excited when we landed I could hardly contain it, and clapped on the runway. I thought that is what people do, but no one else did! Oh well, the guy next to me did a little cause I did. Ha ha! I got off the plane expecting to find Julie shortly. After I had gone through immigration and waited, I began to worry. I walked around looking for her and prayed God would send her to me, but we never connected. So I realized, I had better figure something out. So I found the email she sent with the hotel information and wrote it all down. Went and got my money exchanged, then went and bought a special bus pass and found my way to the bus terminal. Asking people along the way where to go. On the bus the people I asked for help were very kind, and I made it to my destination. Once off the bus, I had all these guys trying to take my luggage and help me get  room. Very nerve racking and annoying. And they wouldn't leave me alone. I had to tell them many times, I am fine!! So I finally got to the registration desk at my hostel, and the woman was confused and so was I. She could only help me if I had the room #, which I didn't. Eventually we found Julie's name on the list and I had to go back down the elevator into the market area where all those men were again ( I honestly don't know how Julie fared for 2 days on her own) and walked through a very strange market to another elevator. Once off the elevator a kind man and his wife let me into the hostel floor with their key and I sat outside our room waiting for Julie. Thankfully, she arrived shortly after having been looking for me for several hours. Dang. Oh well........it worked out!! 

We went into our teeny tiny itty bitty room (sorry Urs, there's no room even on the floor!!) and sat and talked for hours, until we finally realized we needed to sleep so we could get up in a few hours for the conference. 

Now we are getting ready to head out, so I will keep you all posted!!! Thanks for all your love and prayers!!! 

Hong Kong here I come..............

It's high time, I did a post regarding my upcoming trip to Hong Kong!! I will be traveling to Hong Kong next week for the Glory and Grace conference held by Rob Rufus's church, City Church International. I can hardly believe I am going!! A few months back I really felt compelled to believe for going to this conference. I couldn't see how it would be possible, but knew with my Daddy all things are possible. He provided all the finances for this trip. Little by little it just fell into place. I am stunned and grateful for this opportunity!! Several generous folks have stepped up and sponsored this trip for me, and I am blown away by their generosity!! Thanks guys!!

I am also excited to be staying with my good friend Julie Morris for the week, and to be able to meet Ursula, who is also going!!! This is going to be fun!!

So, I would appreciate any prayers as we all travel. And for God to just blow us all away!! I truly need some time away from my daily routine with the family (don't get me wrong I will miss them terribly!!) to just be refreshed in His presence and to be bombarded with great grace preaching and to have some serious fellowship!!!

Turning up the heat..............

Beloved - 2 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth—

for your love is more delightful than wine.

3 Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes;

your name is like perfume poured out.

No wonder the maidens love you!

4 Take me away with you—let us hurry!

Let the king bring me into his chambers.

Friends- We rejoice and delight in you ;

we will praise your love more than wine.

Beloved - How right they are to adore you!

5 Dark am I, yet lovely,

O daughters of Jerusalem,

dark like the tents of Kedar,

like the tent curtains of Solomon.

6 Do not stare at me because I am dark,

because I am darkened by the sun.

My mother's sons were angry with me

and made me take care of the vineyards;

my own vineyard I have neglected.

7 Tell me, you whom I love, where you graze your flock

and where you rest your sheep at midday.

Why should I be like a veiled woman

beside the flocks of your friends?

Friends -8 If you do not know, most beautiful of women,

follow the tracks of the sheep

and graze your young goats

by the tents of the shepherds.

Lover -9 I liken you, my darling, to a mare

harnessed to one of the chariots of Pharaoh.

10 Your cheeks are beautiful with earrings,

your neck with strings of jewels.

11 We will make you earrings of gold,

studded with silver.

Beloved -12 While the king was at his table,

my perfume spread its fragrance.

13 My lover is to me a sachet of myrrh

resting between my breasts.

14 My lover is to me a cluster of henna blossoms

from the vineyards of En Gedi.

Lover- 15 How beautiful you are, my darling!

Oh, how beautiful!

Your eyes are doves.

Beloved -16 How handsome you are, my lover!

Oh, how charming!

And our bed is verdant.

Kiss me with the Kisses of your mouth by Heather Clark!!

A wonderful message by Rob Rufus on this passage!!

Zoe........

Christians aren’t people who change their lives with God’s help, they are a supernatural people who have exchanged their lives, theirs for His, by God’s grace. We are saved then, not by His death but by His resurrected life [Roms 5:10] You can’t have one without the other but it is imperative that you don’t confuse one with the other. His death is the preamble to receiving His Zoë life that is life as God has it in and of Himself.

Grace has always been God's way.........

Was the law ever God's first choice for mankind? ..................... I don't think so. Yes God brought the law, but He always had planned on grace, through the person of Jesus. After all Jesus was the lamb slain before the foundations of the world. And no, the law wasn't plan B, because grace wasn't working. No the law came because, well basically the Israelites asked for it. God knew this beforehand. He knows everything and yet still our failures can't mess up His plan. He uses even our mistakes, our unbelieving hearts to still work together for good. He can turn everything and use it to point to Jesus!! Isn't that awesome!!

I just love Hebrews 10, I find it gets richer and richer every time I am referred back to it! Check out verse 8 in particular and tell me if you think God wanted to bring the law because that was His ultimate plan for us!!

For fun...........

Alright, I'll play, don't want to mess up the flow of fun for everyone. Silliness, I tell ya.
Google your full first name (not your nickname) and the word "needs" like this: "Lydia needs" and then post the first 10 things that Google finds. You may have to go to the website and do a little reading. Then tag 5 friends (not including the person who tagged you) and pass it on.

Here's what I need;

1 ~ Lydia needs a ride

2~ Lydia needs six mortal people to complete her journey (is this prophetic....? )

3~ Lydia needs donations to spread faith, hope and love for women facing cancer

4~ Lydia needs to help find apartments for homeless people who are living with disabilities

5~Lydia needs your prayers (always true!!)

6~ Lydia needs to present a photo in an artistic way and not be one of the masses (that would be nice!!)

7~ Lydia needs the following information to complete the appropriate forms (boring!)

8~ Lydia needs an album cover

9~ Lydia needs a new home (TRUE!!)

10~ Lydia knows she has needs and what they are so that she can achieve satisfaction and pleasure! (Okay, think I KNOW WHO I AM IN HIM AND HE IS MY DELIGHT!!)

Who want's to play?!! Consider yourself tagged.....................I am too lazy to go link 5 people!

One Love.........