Currently, one of my sons is taking swimming lessons. He is VERY fearful of the water. Anyway, after the first lesson or two, he (with a flotation device on) was happily swimming dog paddle around the pool, with no addtional (human) assitance necessary. As we drove home, he declared, "Mom I know how to swim now, I don't need lessons anymore." Gee really?!!
Fast forward to the next lesson when the teacher wanted to move on to the next skill, putting your head under water. This idea did not go over well with my son. NOPE!! Too uncomfortable, too unfamiliar, too scary.
Well, here I am learning from this scenario in my son's life, and realizing that is me too. I have learned 'how' to live in freedom. Yup!! Just when I got good and comfortable and happy as a clam to preach to the whole world that I have got some serious freedom going on here folks, guess what? God says, "let's go deeper, let's plunge you in further." I say, "but I am happily swimming in this freedom I have, it's fun, it's wonderful, it's nice. I do want more, but I think I got it for now, nope- God, I'm good." Can I just say, God really is the most amazingly kind and patient Father!! He doesn't give up on me, and faithfully shows me that together we can do this. He will lead me into 'swimming under water' so to speak. But I have to let go, I have to plunge my head under. But he won't let me sink, and won't let anything happen to me. When I finally relinquish the fear of the unknown, something amazing happens. I begin to realize, this isn't so horrible. God gently encourages me, "Okay, now Lydia, try it again, you can do it!!" "Here goes!", and under I go. And each time I take that plunge, that step of faith, I realize I have overcome fear and have embraced trust. I have stopped making 'learning how to swim' a burden. I have chosen to let not my heart be troubled.
And so as I walk on this journey, day by day, I learn His heart for me. He knows the plans He has for me, and they are good, to prosper me and not to harm me. If that is true, I CAN trust Him. I CAN be grateful and content in each moment, knowing he is holding me and he is molding me. It's all for His good pleasure!!
I am finding lately, that he is being a very faithful gardener of my heart. Pruning away some old dead branches that won't allow me to flourish and be fruitful. And while it is painful, I can honestly say, He knows what He is doing, and I am learning to be grateful for His care of my heart!!